under the blanket

At the crack of dawn this morning -- meaning 8 a.m. to a jobless bum like me -- my mom hauled me out of bed to go to Batu Pahat, which is in the boondocks of our friendly neighbouring country of Malaysia.

A three-hour ride later, I realised why we were going all the way to pray at this particular ulu temple. She wanted to consult this supposedly all-seeing and all-knowing medium about my “future success”.

Knowing my mom, this was less about success in my career and more about the success of my love life. But I feel so vindicated because the medium chided her instead for being overly anxious and pushy. Ha! That will give me ammunition to rebut whenever she starts on one of her weekly nagging sessions about so-and-so who is married and has kids already [unfortunately, a lot of people my age got married while I was away], or how I’m too choosy [she doesn’t believe me when I tell her certain of my male friends are gay], or -- this is my favourite of all her rants -- that I’m too unapproachable and driving men away [as if I have queues of suitors waiting outside my house].

From now on, instead of ignoring her or resorting to sarcasm, I will just calmly remind her that I am “still young”, “need more time to look”, and “will eventually find a very good husband”, in the very words of the medium she trusts so much. Only time will tell if the “prophecy” will come true.