Sunday, November 30

The Retro Wedding Party of the Year

Actually, it's the only wedding I've attended this year, but still it's the best. Its not everyday I can be pink A-go-go girl and do Saturday Night Fever moves with a dude who has pubic hair all over his head. But somehow, the photos are lousy. Don't even have one of the bride and groom together. Drats!

Anyways, congrats to Mousey [the glam one in the shades and shiny gold belt] and Mark [the invisible one]. May married life be one big party that never ends.

Saturday, November 29

Elegantly Wasted

So Wong Kar Wai. So mood. So far removed from reality.

Alcoholics Not So Anonymous

The truth about Friday night. We were smashed and we were shrill. We broke a champagne flute and we took pictures of it. We also sent an SMS to someone named Spike after 3 am and inquired after the health of a bartender named Wong Lang Fong.

But it was still the bestest girl's night out in a long time. Men come and go, but girl friends are forever.

Friday, November 28

It's Friday and I'm thirsting after a watermelon martini. And then I realise that some moron has experimented with a pork martini. I've lost my thirst AND my appetite.
For those still looking for a 100% perfect love. Or just looking for a taste of Haruki Murakami.

Thursday, November 27

I like doing such silly pop quizzes when I'm stressed. Or when I'm not.

Animal Love Test

1. You are attracted to those who are warm and obedient.
2. In the process of courtship, the approach that would make you feel irresistible is patience, never give up on you.
3. The impression you would like to give to your lover is loyal, faithful, never change.
4. You don't like it when your partner is emotional and/or too moody; and you don't know how to please him/her.
5. The kind of relationship you would like to build with your partner is traditional, without saying anything, the other will know what you want, both of you communicate by hearts.
6. You care about the society and morality, you won't do anything wrong after marriage.
7. You are afraid of marriage, you think it would take away your freedom.
8. At this moment, you are quite self-centered; you think of love as something you can get and trash anytime you want.

This test is so inaccurate, only the last part is true.
Misery is...

...writing a cover story at the pace of a turtle at 2 a.m. while waiting for email replies that never arrive. And knowing I have to be awake in four hour's time to head out for a photo shoot.

Wednesday, November 26

Double happiness is...

...having both lunch and dinner with my two lurves. Those twin evils of detox and diet can wait.
Satisfaction is...

...when a nude painter, a good-looking bald man and a red-taped bureaucrat agree to a photoshoot. I love it when things fall neatly into place.

Tuesday, November 25

Happiness is...

...taking a nap on a drizzly public holiday in my lurve's bed, gorging on oily chicken at Boon Tong Kee, dozing off after dinner on the same spot on the bed.

Sunday, November 23

This past weekend is memorable only for the astounding number of lychee, mango and dunno-what-fruit martinis consumed. At last count, it is somewhere in the region of 15, but I may very well be wrong. I have problems with numbers even when I am sober.

Still on the topic of martinis, this is a word of advice from a highly reliable source inside Zouk: Do not order watermelon martinis except on Fridays.

Friday, November 21

More Either/Or

In the front seat or back seat?
Beer belly or receding hairline?
Bad dresser or loud mouth?
To spoon or be spooned?

Wednesday, November 19

There is this game we play called Either/Or, with naughty questions such as "Would you rather be kissing or holding hands?"

Boxers or briefs?
Massage or make-out?
Shower or bubble bath?
Too loud or too fast?
Too many ex-girlfriends or zero girlfriends?
Bad breath or BO?
Too big mouth or too big nostrils?
In the park or in the swimming pool?

Quick contribute some more such conundrums!

Tuesday, November 18

Spot the similarities?

Equally wasted the past two Fridays. These drunken episodes are fast becoming a blur in my memory.

Only pretending to look drunk at Sunday champagne brunch. Or should it be pretending to look sober?

Monday, November 17

SMS @ 10pm, last Thursday
Him: Darling I miz u
Me: How much do you miss me?
Him: A bit+++
Him: Do you miz me?
Me: I miss you so much it hurts. Hehehe
Him: Why leh? I would never hurt you.

SMS @ 3pm, last Friday
Him: Darling what are you doing? I'm having my "breakfast" now.
Me: Working. Don't distract me ok? Why you wake up so early?
Him: Can't sleep without you.

SMS @ 4am, last Saturday
Him: Darling wan to meet me...I knock off soon.
Me: Sleeping
Him: I miz you darling...I heart pain

Why can't I stop responding to the SMSs of someone who
(1) takes it for granted I'm going to sleep with him?
(2) is never awake the same time as me?
(3) known to be a player?
(4) moves too fast for comfort?
(5) does not understand that "I miss you so much it hurts" is a joke?
(6) thinks "miss" is spelt as "miz"?
(7) uses the phrase "I heart pain"?

Thursday, November 13

When I'm awake, he's asleep. When he's awake, I'm asleep.

At this rate, when are we ever going to sleep together?

Tuesday, November 11

The weather is perfect for cuddling in bed with another warm body...does it matter if we have nothing in common besides a love for sleeping?

Sunday, November 9

Haven't been so wasted for a very long time. I may say that everytime [the last time being a mere three weeks ago], but this was seriously bad.

Very unglam, I was on the verge of throwing up, which I'm proud to say has yet to happen in my entire boozing career. Also ended up hugging some bastard whom I don't even bother talking to when I'm sober. Flirted shamelessly with semi-cute bartenders for free champagne, but failed. Staggered home and only managed to shrug off my top but not my jeans before losing consciousness. Woke up to find mascara smudges all over face still caked with makeup and phone number of someone named Alvin in my pocket.

And guess what? I'm in the office working now -- with sandpaper-like skin, unsexy glasses, slow reflexes and a massive hangover -- and have a phone interview at 7 pm. Somebody just kill me now, please.

Tuesday, November 4

Walking around with a dagger jutting out of my back sure is a nasty feeling. And I'm not even talking about Halloween.

Saturday, November 1

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Note: We had more fun dressing up for Halloween than at the actual party at Zouk last night.