Saturday, February 26

the force is not with me

I'm afraid my time as an adrenaline junkie is up.

I used to be able to go on daredevil funfair rides, one after the after, with zero ill effects. In fact, I did a story in which I rated all the rides at the UK Funfair when it first came to town a couple of years back. It was the most fun I've ever had on the job, plus my ed was super impressed that I was totally not afraid.

So when I heard at the beginning of the month that the funfair was back, I was super excited!!!!!!!

We finally went late last night.

First stop was the Air Force One, sort of like a revolving Viking. Wheeeeeeee!

Then it was bump and grind on the Takada, sort of like sitting on the rim of a giant frying pan without a seat belt. Wheeeeeeeeeeee!

Third stop was the scariest -- and most expensive at $15 -- ride known as G Force, which basically spun you from great heights and great force, hence the name. It was 2-1/2 minutes of screaming and pure adrenaline rush.

Very proud of myself for letting go of my death grip on the safety bars and even rallying the stranger next to me to do the same. Wheeeeeeeeeee!

But it was a huge mistake to immediately board the Air Force One for the second time.

As we were hurled and twirled around for the final revolution, I experienced motion sickness for the first time in my life. No wheeeeeeeee...

I hate to admit it, but I am no longer a spring chicken. There was a sick sensation in my stomach that stayed with me for the next hour or so.

But the next morning, even though I had bruises on my elbows and my biceps/triceps/cordyceps ached from holding on so tightly, I was raring to go again. Wheeeeeeeee!

pre-ride jitters

Just the thought of the rides is enough to give me clammy palms, make me break out in cold sweat and put on an insane grin at the same time.

As we were arranging our little funfair outing, I had casually mentioned it to a friend. Later, I messaged him the details.

Me: Up for wild roller coaster rides tonight? Wheeeee
Him: Eat full full then sit lah, lagi exciting
Me: OK, I dare you to do it. On lah?
Him: Ok, but you sit below me haha

In the end, he couldn't make it. So I had clammy palms, cold sweat and grinned so insanely for nothing.

Sunday, February 20

self lurve

My horoscope for the week:

You can search throughout the entire universe for someone who is more deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself, but that person is not to be found anywhere. You yourself, as much as anyone, deserve your love and affection. -- Buddha

Which reminds me of a letter from a reader a couple of weeks ago, in response to this Agony Aunt column I do:

I am 40 yrs old and still single. Mr L and me have been working together in the same company for 20 yrs. I have known him from single to married and father of 2 now but my interest for him is growing stronger each day.

Specially so when I have slimmed down since 3 years ago. I have more confidence with my appearance and look now. I have tried getting close to him with the help of my company's secretary (as I am shy) by organising more official outing like lunches (sometime I'll cook for him cos I want him to enjoy my food) and I'll always sit next to him when he drived.

During our D&D, my "invisible hand" had helped me to get a ride from him. I wore a low v-neck top which can show my cleavage but he has no expression, only hold my shoulder when taking photo (with the help of my "invisible hand" urging him to hold me). Immediately after the dinner, he fetched me home and rush back to his wife.

With all my efforts in slimming down and looking prettier has not help him to notice me. He only look at me when my "invisble hand" urge him to. I am saddened and depressed by his "unappreciative" behaviour.

Please do not print my email address or my name for fear my colleagues may read it.

Monday, February 14

to lurve and lurves

Saturday wait!

Sunday always comes too late!

Happy Valentine's to the pair in the pix and all the pairs out there!

Friday, February 11

pick me up

According to the latest Elle, Japanese researchers have found that the best pick-up line is "This time next year, let's be laughing together."

The Elle columnist thought it was lame. I kinda liked it, though. I'm easy like that.

Saturday, February 5

cry baby

Something is wrong with me or my hormones. Am now dabbing my eyes with tissue while reading Ella Enchanted alone in the office. A children's book, for crying out loud!

Thursday, February 3

weighing in

I've got a new toy -- digital weighing machine which also automatically calculates BMI -- and I can't stop playing with it.

Gain in weight during the day = 1kg
Loss in weight doing nothing more than just sleeping eight hours = 0.5kg
Gain in weight after a satisfying meal of pasta and desserts = 0.3kg
Loss in weight after a satisfying dump = 0.3kg
Gain in weight after putting on jeans = 0.2kg

Wednesday, February 2

quote unquote

"I really love your work. I've got two of your paintings."
~ British Prime Minister Tony Blair to Ian McEwan

Tuesday, February 1


I have not shed so many tears while reading before. The Time Traveler's Wife got me all teary on the very first page:


The time will come
when, with elation,
you will greet yourself arriving
at your own door, in your own mirror,
and each will smile at the other's welcome,

and say, sit here. Eat.
You will love again the stranger who was your self.
Give wine. Give bread. Give back your heart
to itself, to the stranger who has loved you

all your life, whom you ignored
for another, who knows you by heart.
Take down the love letters from the bookshelf,

the photographs, the desperate notes,
peel you own image from the mirror.
Sit. Feast on your life.

~ Derek Walcott

There I was, alone in a cafe that was empty except for a gaggle of high-pitched Japanese housewives, and ridiculously wiping my eyes with a paper serviette. I had to stop after a few pages.

Later, blubbering discreetly on the bus:

Ah, but what can we take along
into that other realm? Not the art of looking,
which is learned so slowly, and nothing that happened here. Nothing.
The sufferings, then. And above all, the heaviness,
and the long experience of love,-- just what is wholly

~ Rainer Maria Rilke

The next day, while waiting in a quiet nook in a noisy Japanese restaurant, I'm reading again. It's a thick dictionary-sized novel. And for no reason, I'm all choked up and near tears.

Much later, in the still of the night:

Angel!: If there were a place that we didn't know of, and there,
on some unsayable carpet, lovers displayed
what they could never bring to mastery here -- the bold
exploits of their high-flying hearts,
their towers of pleasure, their ladders
that have long since been standing where there was no ground, leaning
just on each other, trembling -- and could master all this,
before the surrounding spectators, the innumerable soundless dead:
would there, then, thrown down their final, forever saved-up,
forever hidden, unknown to us, eternally valid
coins of happiness before the at last
genuinely smiling pair on the gratified

~ Rilke

And C was right. The moment I finished sobbing through the story of the wife of a man who travels through time -- it sounds like sci fi mumbo jumbo, but it's more about fate, deja vu, love, longing and waiting -- I wanted to read it all over again. In private this time, so I can bawl without embarrassment.

But my eyes were too swollen to continue, so I went to sleep instead.